Business coaching

No, not by me. Definitely not by me. It’s simply something that seems to be very, very popular in the internets right now, so I thought I’d share some thoughts.

What triggered me was this pic that’s been going around the internet for a few months now.

Narrow-minded watermelonomics.

Yeah, it does convey its point rather well. But, it still misses something big, something that will earn you a frak-ton more money than simply selling leveled-up watermelons.

So, I fixed it:

I mean, come on? Why sell watermelons, when you can sell the how of selling watermelons? The former spoil, and require transport, processing, storage, and usually conforming to some kind of health regulations. The latter is fully immaterial, and can easily be turned into a digital form for easy distribution. Plus it doesn’t have to be limited to watermelons. For any would-be watermelonepreur, there are hundreds of people selling something else. But still selling.

In all semi-seriousness, I listed down some bullet-thoughts about the online business coaching scene.

  • Huge markets. For any single person willing to buy a watermelon, there are at least three looking for a quick-fix to escape their daily tedium in the watermelon industry.
  • No credentials required. Which is technically fine – very often practical experience will trump formal education on its own. But on this field, you don’t even need a relevant track-record. You can woo your customers with how much money you’ve made scamming serving people similar to them. Something like “Hundreds of suckers succeeders bought my latest online course!!” Which sucks. Think of it. Having been able to sell a get-rich-quickly scheme tells absolutely nothing of anyone’s ability to teach or coach someone else in the B2B world of watermelon juicers.
  • Luckily, the supply is also so huge that not everybody makes it. It’s probably even gonna start saturating some time soon, with so many would-be conmen with the literary skills of a toad. Drowning in the noise of a million other toads, luckily.
  • Continuing with same topic, I think the entire industry is gonna go full-meta any moment now. The teach-people-how-to-get-richquickly scheme is becoming the #1 how-to-get-rich-quickly scheme. Somebody is bound to start selling coaching courses to the would-be coaches.
  • Most marketing tips in general are very scam-esque. Like increasing conversion rates by changing the color of your call-to-action button. Really? Are people who get influenced by something like that even legally capable?
  • That optimized button will certainly work when you’re selling a 50k software license to a billion-dollar industry giant. Right??
  • Again: adding a computer-generated image of a book to boost the sales of a freaking ELECTRONIC book??
  • Even if the alleged coach does indeed have a good track record in doing and growing business, does that automatically make them a good coach? Of coarse not. It’s funny, really. Even in the bodybuilding scene it’s relatively-widely acknowledged that the hyooooogest pros don’t usually make the best coaches or trainers. In the online business world? Crickets.
  • That been said, many of the said BB pros do indeed sell training programs (or have some sold in their name), with good success apparently.

That. Is. All.


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Business coaching

2 thoughts on “Business coaching

  • Thanks! 🙂

    And funnily enough, I first thought this would be too niche-like a topic to write about – before realizing I mostly write about finite elements and electrical machines 😀

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